June 9, 2008

Hm... I can't remember if this is the only june 9th entry. Sorry if it is.
So at work, I did a lot of thinking and decided to talk to Chakiz (who, btw, IS single... well... yeah. So now we're just... enjoying each other?)
Anyway, so I was getting sick of not knowing and being on the wall all the time-- because I really, really like him. But I don't want to be falling for him if he doesn't want me to, because then that would be one more guy I've been obsessed with that just DOESN'T want me like that. I would be very disappointed, because I really like this one.
And one more reason why I should like him: I said: "I think we need to talk" which usually, in dating land, translates to either "I've cheated on you" or "I'm dumping you"... but I've had guys laugh when I said that, only to have them then dump me with that line. Anyway, I think that I'd like to change this connotation. I don't mean that. I like Chakizetta a lot. So much. It's bad because I'm starting to think that if he wants to meet me half way, even him going away in the summer and me going away all school year, we could actually make this work. I want, more than anything right now, to make this work. Like, badly.
Very, very much. He has a personality that fights mine for dominance, but I don't know if one will ever really come out on top--but it's always interesting.
Anyway, I think I scared the poor tall man, because he was like... >eek< and just kinda buggered off of msn when I said that. Haha. Oops. So next time, I need to think up better words. 'Cause it's the exact opposite of what he thinks I meant that I did mean.
I just want to ask him if he wants to get more serious :O
Yeah. That's what I said.
I'll give up being single and all that jazz so that I can be happier with him.
I've gone insane.
Insanely insane.
Someone make sure I'm not sleeping:P But it makes me happy to think about it. I want this, a lot. In fact I feel all fuzzy about him.

Euw. I sound sickening.

It's the music: Carly Simon-You just call out my name
Maroon 5--Sunday Morning

OOh, caught the end of the one song when I remembered I was supposed to be writing them down. Haha. Then it went into Maroon 5.

Hm... I appreciate Chakiz.
I desire him.
I long for his touch,
and I even want his little mood swings to continue.

Mmm... and he smells so good. :D
And I get to keep him for like, three nights, all to myself! I'm going camping with him, at Turkey Point! I can't wait!:D I hope it's awesome. I'm so excited.

And, Trent U sent me the forms for the everything for rez. I got into LEC, Lady Eaton College, single room. :P Means I can have *friend(s)* over. And if Chakiz says he wants to go more serious, you can bet your ass that I'll drive all the friggen way to Hamilton to get him, to bring him back to dorm for three days, where I'll be happily entertaining him.
But Apparently people can't be over for more than three days at any one time.
It's weird.
;P I'll bet I just figured out another way around the system though. He can't stay in my room for more than three days, but he can stay in three of my friends' rooms for three days, and three days, and three days...lmao. Aah, finding ways around laws is so much fun.
Anyway, I lurve the way I feel right now; I'm not so horrible feeling like I have been all day because I was so confused about where we (chakiz and I) are. Now, at least, it's kind of out there, minus a few main ideas.

Guys, I really hope he's not weirded out. But it's too late to avoid bringing up now... So, wish me luck!