You know, I try really, really hard sometimes. In a lot. I try really hard to make people happy. I try really hard to keep my car fixed, my computer running.
I try to be everything I`m supposed to be--which if you look at current female role models, it`s fricken impossible. I have to keep everything clean and cook because, well, female. I also have to be independent enough to have a job, live on my own, be going to school and own a vehicle. These two things do not readily mesh. I think I`m at the point where I give up. I don`t even care about anything anymore because I just can`t.
I was picking up my boyfriend from work today--he doesn`t drive, doesn`t have a car and is really not attempting to have either-- and he has this annoying tendency to TEXT me where he is so I can come get him. Like a taxi. Only... better... he moves while I`m driving. I`ll be one place, and he`ll be like `` okay. passing the mall. `` and then like `` passing the beer store``. Now, if you drive, you know it`s damn near impossible to read a text and drive safely at one in the morning while it``s ligtly misting on your car`s windshield. Yes.
I can`t believe it. I have told him about it two nights in a row, and I am getting a little miffed. And then he has the audacity to yell at me and say ``I can imagine you`re wondering why I`m mad!` Yeah. `cause me yelling wouldn`t have angered you. so now he`s angry at me for being angry at him, my car`s brakes are rapidly failing, I don`t have a job, I`m only a mediocre student and I`m not even back on the stupid varsity rugby team because it`s ìnvitation only`.
Yay.
And now my blog is going wonky and every bit of random little signs and signals are screwing up. Or maybe there`s been a new virus for Windows 7 installed on my computer....
Joy, joy, the world sure does run nicely.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Friday, August 7, 2009
August 07, 09
Well, short week, I suppose. Not too much to say. I am missing girlie-girls, immensely. Sadly, being around people who aren't so into things that I am is beginning to take a toll on me. I mean, I can only look like a guy for so long.
But, I guess that's the price of leaving childhood lady-friends at home and hooking up at school with a guy you actually kind of like. I spend the majority of my time sitting in my house. I'm not saying I couldn't go out, I'm saying that the girls I know here where my school is are not the most... makeup-adoring people. Then again...
Well, I offered one of my closest friends up here a night of girly mayhem and she replied with an "Only if there's a horror movie on so I don't feel totally stupid".
Could it be that perhaps I have discovered that I actually kinda like the girly things in life a little and miss them when they're gone? Yes.
Sometimes... I dunno.
Sometimes I think it would be nice to find some new friends who I can be close to, but then... I don't know. Then I trust them and then they like, steal my food and cutlery and stuff.
Yeah. living with people isn't the greatest way to go. Don't live in dorm, but don't live in a house with a large sum of people either. Unless they're all clones of you or you're ready to clean after five of them because you'd like space to shower/pee/eat/clean dishes/do anything other than sleep...
yeah. Definitely one of the hardest summers of my life.
And I still don't even have a job. GT tomorrow, I think; dollar stores, too.
well, I'm going to work on playing with nails and colours and let you guys in on how I've done them in the new future. It should be cool, ish.
More or less.
:D
But, I guess that's the price of leaving childhood lady-friends at home and hooking up at school with a guy you actually kind of like. I spend the majority of my time sitting in my house. I'm not saying I couldn't go out, I'm saying that the girls I know here where my school is are not the most... makeup-adoring people. Then again...
Well, I offered one of my closest friends up here a night of girly mayhem and she replied with an "Only if there's a horror movie on so I don't feel totally stupid".
Could it be that perhaps I have discovered that I actually kinda like the girly things in life a little and miss them when they're gone? Yes.
Sometimes... I dunno.
Sometimes I think it would be nice to find some new friends who I can be close to, but then... I don't know. Then I trust them and then they like, steal my food and cutlery and stuff.
Yeah. living with people isn't the greatest way to go. Don't live in dorm, but don't live in a house with a large sum of people either. Unless they're all clones of you or you're ready to clean after five of them because you'd like space to shower/pee/eat/clean dishes/do anything other than sleep...
yeah. Definitely one of the hardest summers of my life.
And I still don't even have a job. GT tomorrow, I think; dollar stores, too.
well, I'm going to work on playing with nails and colours and let you guys in on how I've done them in the new future. It should be cool, ish.
More or less.
:D
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
August 4th, 2009
Well, with any luck I will be back in school in September, and to tell you the truth, I'm looking forward to it. I'm kind of bored with a summer that's close to four and a half months.
Rugby this year has been classified as an "invitation only" so I have no chance of making a team this year... Not many rookies did. Too bad for us. The rookies who did make it were ridiculously good. I'm okay with that. I'm going to play baseball now, and hopefully work too.
Furthermore I'm now a business student. Yay! And I found out that I can't go on to second year courses unless I do the first year course-ADMN 100- that I missed. But I have an accounting 100 so I'm good for that one at least. It just puts my schooling a full year behind, by the end of this one it will be about two.
My house is unhappy to be in so I spend the majority of my time at my boyfriend's.
And hopefully soon I will be employed.
Maybe.
Rugby this year has been classified as an "invitation only" so I have no chance of making a team this year... Not many rookies did. Too bad for us. The rookies who did make it were ridiculously good. I'm okay with that. I'm going to play baseball now, and hopefully work too.
Furthermore I'm now a business student. Yay! And I found out that I can't go on to second year courses unless I do the first year course-ADMN 100- that I missed. But I have an accounting 100 so I'm good for that one at least. It just puts my schooling a full year behind, by the end of this one it will be about two.
My house is unhappy to be in so I spend the majority of my time at my boyfriend's.
And hopefully soon I will be employed.
Maybe.
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